Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize
