After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
operation have a gay friend backfired
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
This baby is an asshole
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Randomize
