you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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