'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
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