So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
