Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
so much tequila, so little girl.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
