This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
you had me at cake vodka
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
Randomize
