hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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