Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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