sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
You ate ashes out of my bong
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Randomize
