I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
