so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
Randomize
