I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
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