Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Randomize
