Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Randomize
