Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
is that a dick in a sweater?
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
