THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
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