all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
worst night to have a conscience
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
Randomize
