Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
Randomize
