the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
as a side note pls kill me
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
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