Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
