that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Randomize
