I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
Randomize
