Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
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