Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
Drunk is not a location!
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize
