is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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