6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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