what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
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