Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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