I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
I wish there were birth control emojis
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Randomize
