Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize