Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Randomize
