the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
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