awoke with 47 plastic lawn flamingos in my bed and on surrounding floor. explanation?
you said they were your minions of evil that protected you from ferrets.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
You've changed since you got that strap on
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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