You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize
