bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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