you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
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