Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Randomize
