Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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