i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
wow bdsm is so cute
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