Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
