At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Randomize
