I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Randomize
