Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
