Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
don't judge my taste in strippers
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Randomize
