dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
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