Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Randomize
