TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
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