can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
