Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
Randomize
